January 27th, 2012

money monster

Amazon.com is eating my money a little bit at a time. I've bought all sorts of smaller items lately: ebooks, music scores, cat toys and household items in the past few weeks from it...amazing...

must...watch...out...

January 27th, 2012

A New Act

I swear... I am getting super frustrated with certain songs (or should I say just one 'song' *ahem*) in Rocksmith. I was doing just fine as I entered "A New Act" and then a song comes along that makes me think "wtf...I'm soooo terribly newbie again!" As if I didn't need humbling up until that point...ow. Just when I thought I was getting the hang of things...a total wrench thrown in the wheel. *cry* *cry*

January 26th, 2012

dodging stereotypes

When I meet someone for the first time, I typically avoid asking them the innocuous question of "what school did you go to?" It's not because I'm not curious but rather because that question is usually reflected back at me.

The private school I went to has a positive reputation for academic and athletic performance. That being said, in local areas, it has a significantly bad reputation of character; people that go to the school are often seen as snobbish, rich, privileged and otherwise downright mean. This is typically perpetuated each year by schoolgoers yelling inappropriate and snobbish comments at local football games, the occassional local vandalism or fights breaking out, and otherwise general things like the belief and behavior that "you're more privileged than everyone" just because you went to that school. It makes me perturbed just writing about these things because I think back on some of the examples and events I experienced.

I was one of those students who never went to the high school football games. I just never found them entertaining. Partly because football wasn't my "thing" but mostly because I knew the way certain people at my school behaved there and that idea just never sat well with me. It reminded me of the "ugly" side of people. Looking back, I'm happy that I never did and I can't say that I've ever regretted a decision like that.

I typically avoid the "private vs public" school argument. I've met some really gifted and intelligent people come out of both sides. I've also met some people of really great character and integrity come out of both sides as well. The people that impress me the most, are those that have made the most out of the least. I guess this particular point transcends the "public vs private" argument as I've known private school students working a job on the side to "get by" and still managing to excel in academics. I've also seen public school students rise above adversity and go on to do terrific things.

One of my good friends is an example of that. He lived on his own in Hawaii at a young age while his parents moved back to Japan, working a job while going to a public school and then going on to pay his way through college. Whether he knows it or not, to this day he is one of my role models (I do express this to him on occassion). I work with him everyday and admire his infallible integrity, sound judgement, patience and friendliness. I aspire to be like him in so many ways.

Another example was my ex-gf. I likely never verbally conveyed to her the depth of admiration I have for her situation; unfortunately, given current situations, it'll have to remain unspoken. Anyways...I'll avoid elaborating more on that as I'm sure I must've in passed entries on different topics. A shining example nonetheless.

Having never had to experience either such situation or a situation even close to them, I can only appreciate those accomplishments from the sidelines.

People may say that going to a private school is a "privilege"; I can't argue with that as it does typically cost a lot of money and unfortunately, because of that, isn't accessible to just anyone. Having gone to one myself, I can say that I can't change the fact that I went to one. However, as an individual, I can make sure that I don't let it influence the way I treat people I meet and those around me; try to treat each one as a "human being" and otherwise leave any personal judgements I may make to be based solely on the merit of the individual persons' character.

When I was younger, it used to be a big deal when meeting new people. The second people knew what school I was from, I could see the gears turning in their head; preconceptions of myself were already being formed. I'm fortunate that people, as a whole, are very accommodating and after talking to them at length that preconception fades out.

Nowadays, the "school" question comes up less and less. Perhaps because the people I usually meet are older in age. By the time the "school" question comes up, I'm already comfortable with the person and merely "casual conversation" is all the resultant of that question becomes. Even still, although not as brightly, past history burns in my mind and it's a question I typically avoid asking.

January 25th, 2012

Patriotism and Perspective

Last night as well as tonight, I didn't get that much sleep. I've been riveted by an autobiographical book about a veteran's war experience, training and patriotism. The nearly 400 pages of text vanished quickly and from them it's helped me reaffirm the depth of "patriotism" and perspective in the grand scheme of things.

I've always been an admirer of military veterans. It's reassuring to come across some person that is so deeply rooted in their faith and love in their country. We, as people, can be critical and disapproving of changes in our government or politics or way of life. However, at the end of the day, through it all, we should all still be proud of it, loyal to it and possess that sense of "love" towards the country we call home. That thought was subconsciously driven home to me over and over again while I read through the book; something I'm entirely grateful for.

Perspective. Reading through the book brought a lot of that to the table. I've been sheltered from the harshness of war and loss. The personalities of real people penned out in the book and some of who were abruptly and sometimes violently lost made me think that some of the things I fret about in daily life aren't really such a big deal. Frustration, anxiety, anger, I can get through them all.

It's eye opening to read through these sorts of peoples' stories; to glimpse at their depth of experiences, perhaps learn from them and take away something towards daily life. I could but only dream that one day I'd have the perspective and patriotism displayed therein.

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